Maintaining a strong marriage during fertility treatment
Fertility treatment is often emotionally challenging both individually and as a couple. Some couples experience significant problems while trying to navigate the process.
Be honest about your feelings. During treatment, you will have many important decisions to make. You and your partner may not agree on the best path to take. While it may be difficult to share feelings that are controversial, the outcome of fertility treatment is so important that you need to truthfully express your thoughts and feelings. Actively listen to your partner to make sure that you understand their point of view throughout the process.
Look for ways to help each other out. Talk with your partner about how thing are going, and offer suggestions for ways they can help support you. Even if one person always takes the garbage out and the other person always does the laundry, you may need to change responsibilities at home in order to lighten the load for someone. Also, keep in mind that fertility treatment can be stressful so be realistic about responsibilities and simplify things as much as possible.
Be more than fertility patients. Fertility treatment can be all-consuming. You forget who you were as a couple before this process started. Treat each other with the same admiration and respect you would if you were still dating. Make sure to do things that you enjoy with one another. When you talk to one another, make sure to focus on the positive things going on in your lives as well as fertility.
Submitted by Kristin Blackwell, LMSW, Counselor at the Fertility Center (August 2009)
Tags: Counselor, feelings during fertility treatments, fertility treatments, maintaining marriage